On April 29th nineteen eighty-something I was born to a new proud mother
She said she would always care for me til the day she died
And she never let anyone ruin my life, but they sure tried
The day that I turned eighteen, my grandfather told me
He said, "Chris, I think you should join the Army"
I said "I don't really think I am cut out for that
No, I'm fairly certain I wouldn't last
But I do agree the benefits are quite astounding
But I know that I would throw up if I saw someone dying"
But if I went I'd make the best of every moment
And show respect to my commanding officer
And come home with a medal or something cool like that
Just a few months ago, my best friend inquired
He said "Do you think you'll go back to college?"
I said, "Yeah, I'm sure eventaully, when the time is right
And I find a university I kinda like
'Cause I do agree, the experience is quite inticing
If I don't get too distracted by all the drinking"
But if I went I'd make the best of every moment
And pay attention to the teacher
And come home with some knowledge or something great like that