Haunted by a restlessness,
I fail to find peace,
while thoughts of a self-destructive nature
drive me to madness.
What was left of happiness in life is now gone:
even the sun looks dark in my eyes.
My heart feels desolate.
Trapped in a maze of horror,
forsaken by God, I cannot escape.
This time I don't see a way out,
except for death.
Although I want to be freed
from the despair that envelops my soul,
I neglect to find help,
unsure if I even want it to end.
Playing with the thought of a self-inflicted death
to end this nightmare called life.
What was left of happiness in life is now gone:
even the sun looks dark in my eyes.
My heart feels desolate
as if hell already burns inside.
What if this pain does not end with death,
but continues to haunt my soul in hell?
I cannot bear these visions of despair,
so I stay my hand.
In a moment of solitude,
I cry out from my misery to the One I fear.
As new strength refills my heart with courage,
I find myself willing to go on.
I slowly rise on my feet to confront the demons
which sought my death.