I Found A Hobby
It started when,
a lad of 10
I told my friends
"I'll meet cha,
at Dr. Blood's revenge"
which was
a gruesome
horror feature.
and when I saw
the awesome torture chamber in that flick,
I found I got a hard-on,
while the other kids got sick.
I found a hobby.
I found a hobby.
out in the lobby,
I went insane.
A voice inside me,
said, "Kid you love it,
I think you're into heavy pain" (?)
By 13 years
I'd taught my peers
about bondage and submission.
gave illustrated lectures on
the Spanish Inquisition.
Some boys take dirty books to the jon
and give themselves a whack.
I did the same with lithographs,
of thumbscrews and the rack. (?)
At 22
the time came due
to choose a life's profession.
I struggled hard to think of one
in line with mine obsession.
I could have been a boxer
or lawyer, yeah, I guess.
But no one causes suffering
like a licensed DDS.
And now my hobby
ain't just my hobby,
no, its-a my job
to make
the patients shake with fear.
What started out as
a secret pastime
is now my hobby....
and my career.
Say "Ahh"