When I was 10, I had a live in babysitter
She had a pet kangaroo, wore big breasts and feathers
She gave me ice cream every time I screamed and hollered
And I loved her till I caught her sexing my father
She gonna hurt you daddy never again
She wasn't a friend, so I killed her
She gonna hurt you daddy never again
She wasn't a friend, so I killed her
When I was 13 the plumber stopped by
The house was flooding and no one knew why
Within no time at all he got rid of the water
And I was grateful till I caught him plunging my mother
He gonna hurt you momma never again
He wasn't a friend, so I killed him
He gonna hurt you momma never again
He wasn't a friend so I killed him
He gonna hurt you momma never again
He wasn't a friend, so I killed him
And I don't feel bad about it
Say, say, say what?
And I don't feel bad about it
These are my fondest childhood memories
I, I was just a kid
So they let me go despite the murders that I did
All grown up now, as you can see
My parents are still happily married, thanks to me
She gonna hurt you daddy never again
She wasn't a friend, so I killed her
She gonna hurt you daddy never again
She wasn't a friend, so I killed her
He gonna hurt you momma never again
He wasn't a friend, so I killed him
He gonna hurt you momma never again
He wasn't a friend so I killed him
These are my fondest childhood memories