The other day I ran into an old friend
Joe was his name
So I said, "Joe, how ya been?"
He said, "JR, you won't believe this, but things ain't worth a damn."
And I said, "Joe, what's the problem?'
He said "JR, you wanna know my problem? Well, I'll tell ya my problem."
And he began his story, something like this:
All my life I've been single
I didn't wanna be tied down
But I finally did it, I finally got married
And the chants started goin' around
She was divorced and had three kids
They all had fair skin and blonde hair
But I didn't know their daddy was a nigger
And daddy just had to be there
Awwwww...
What do you do when
Everything's messed up
Stickin' down in your crawl
Other men lucky
All they have to aggitate 'em
Is a dog-gone
Mother-in-law
But this black hairy dude
Livin' down at my house
Beats all you ever saw
I'm the sole-bred winner
Of a wife and three
Bakin' ninnies
And a nigger-in-law
And he kept on-a-talkin'
And I just kept on listenin'
And he went on, something like this:
It all started last friday evenin'
I got home from work, there he sat
Sittin' there loafin', restin' and-a-smokin'
Man, he was ace of spades black
I didn't know just who he was then
But it wasn't too long 'til I did
He said, "Don't get uptight, I have visitin' rights.
I came to see your wife and my kids."
Awwwww...
What do you do when
Everything's messed up
Stickin' down in your crawl
Other men lucky
All they have to aggitate 'em
Is a dog-gone
Mother-in-law
But this black hairy dude
Livin' down at my house
Beats all you ever saw
I'm the sole-bred winner
Of a wife and three
Bakin' ninnies
And a nigger-in-law
But he talked on, and I began to figure out
That Joe had found a solution
He said:
He was still there saturday evenin'
Just-a-watchin' me mow the lawn
He watched the game on sunday and the soaps on monday
It's tuesday and he still wasn't gone
Suddenly I got me an idea
And I came up with a plan
I turned my nigger-loving wife and her nigger ex-husband
Over to the Ku Klux Klan
Hehe...
That's what you do
When everything's messed up
Stickin' down in your crawl
Never again will I
Ever say a word
About anybody's
Mother-in-law
That nigger ho'ed up
When the Klan showed up
It's the last thing he ever saw
Now I'm the ex-husband
Of a wife with three
Bakin' ninnies
And a nigger-in-law
I'm the proud ex-husband
Of a wife with three
Bakin' ninnies
And a nigger-in-law