The No Smoking Song
I aye aye aye aye
A lady that I know works in an office all day
She used a smokeless ashtray with a fan
When she was told it was no longer okay
They had to pry the Camels from her hand
They said no no no no
You can't smoke here no more
Your lucky you can still smoke outdoors
It causes disease
And makes your co-workers sneeze
And anyway it's now against the law
A man once had a yen for Oriental Cuisine
At the finest Chinese restaurant in the land
When he lit up the waiter let out a scream
And smashed it out in his moo goo guy pan
No no no no you can't smoke here no more
We're tired of rakin' buts off the floor
He said no smokin' please
And something rude in Chinese
You go now, chop chop chop
Eww It stinks here anyways
Aye aye aye aye aye
A man I know just got a flight from Sand Diego
They said you cannot smoke until we land
He couldn't do without his Marlboro
The locked him for smoking in the can
They said no no no no
You can't smoke here no more
We told you when you first came on board
It causes disease and makes the passengers wheeze
And anyway it's now against the law