They Held Me Down
Shel Silverstein
"This next song is dedicated to all the cop outs in the world. My friends mostly, including me."
It was Sat night at the slammer
The gavel was falling like a hammer
As they dragged in every freak
From off the road
One by one they entered the cell
And the stories that they had to tell
Were all different
But all seemed to end on the very same note
"They held me down and they put it on my nose
They even sprinkled a little bit on my clothes
Yeahâ?¦ I know what you're thinkin
But I ain't one of those
Noâ?¦ they held me down and put it in my nose."
This wino in the corner got up and shook himself outâ?¦.
He said,
"Well they held me down and poured it down my throat
That's what they did.
They even planted the bottle in my coat
Anybody want some?
Yeahâ?¦ the reason why my pants so wet
Is they pushed me off the boat
After they held me down and poured it down my throat."
And this chick in the next cellâ?¦
She said,
"I heard you guys talking
And let me tell you somethingâ?¦
He held me down and he put it you know where
Ohhhhâ?¦ I told him I was a virgin
But he didn't care
Nooooâ?¦ the pig!
Ahhhhâ?¦ you see his wallet's in my purse.
What's it doing there?
He held me down and put it you know where."
And then this cat got up.
Wellâ?¦ he half got up.
He lifted his head and,
He said,
"Hey, manâ?¦ hey held me down and they put it in my vein.
They even held a pistol to my brain
Or I wouldn'ta done it
Ohhh.. these scars on my arms are where I crashed through the window paneâ?¦
Tryin' to get awaaaaaaaaay
When they held me down and put it in my vein."
And then this cat.. a rollie-eyed cat in a raincoat, and shoes
And the bottom of his pants were cut off at the knees
He said,
"She held me down and put it in my face.
Oh, the disgrace.
And that's the fact on which I'm gonna base my case.
She was overweight and underage.
And we was at my place.
But she held me down and put it in my face."
They held me down and made me write this song..........
Share
More from Shel Silverstein
Mermaid
Shel Silverstein
Changing of the Seasons
Shel Silverstein
Peanut Butter Sandwich
Shel Silverstein
Goodnight Little House Plant
Shel Silverstein
The Diet Song
Shel Silverstein
I Got Stoned and I Missed It
Shel Silverstein
True Story [#][*]
Shel Silverstein
The Ugliest Man in Town
Shel Silverstein
A Front Row Seat to Hear Ole Johnny Sing [*]
Shel Silverstein
Boy Named Sue
Shel Silverstein
Bigtime
Shel Silverstein
Diet Song
Shel Silverstein
Jennifer Johnson and Me
Shel Silverstein
$100,000 in Pennies
Shel Silverstein
Thirteen Tons of Ice Cream
Shel Silverstein
25 Minutes To Go
Shel Silverstein
Acapulco Goldie
Shel Silverstein
Alimoney (Also recorded as "Alimony")
Shel Silverstein
All About You
Shel Silverstein
All The Time In The World
Shel Silverstein