Vampire Slayer Blues
Well, I look around and I
Can barely recall
That I had a life before
The day I heard the Call,
Now I've been Chosen...
Didn't get no chance to choose.
I've got those probably dying before I turn twenty,
All the undead come and look at me funny,
You'll call me a corpse before you call me "˜honey'
Vampire Slayer Blues.
You say that I'm morbid, that I'm
Becoming obsessed.
Well, if you had my Calling,
You can bet you'd be depressed,
"˜Cause it's no picnic --
Even if I win, I lose.
I've got those chain mail is not coming back into fashion,
I'd rather be shopping than out monster mashing,
And carnage is not that conducive to passion
Vampire Slayer Blues.
I went to my Watcher, he's a reasonable guy;
I said, "˜Sir, will I make it?'
He said, "˜No dear, you'll die.'
I said, "˜That's not inspiring,' he said,
"˜True, but you see -- I know that it's tiring
But fighting and dying is your destiny!'
(spoken) Jerk.
I can't find a boyfriend, I keep,
Keep breaking my dates.
On my last Career Day, my
Results came back "˜minion of fate'.
There's no retirement,
And you've never paid your dues.
I've got those vampires and zombies and werewolves, oh my,
Why shouldn't I live before I have to die,
So pass me that stake and kiss evil goodbye,
Vampire Slayer Blues!
Written on: 2005-03-14. Seanan McGuire