Vaporub
Kept my heart locked away
I kept it far away from me
Found a place down by the river where nobody goes
Buried far beneath the levee
Places where I used to go
When it rained, my heart went deeper so
Deep blue underneath the sea
Washed away for no one to see me
I don't have the feelings I'm supposed to know
And I don't get the feeling that you understand
Only get the feeling that you're feeling sorry for me
That's never been the point of what I've said
Never really knew what love was
Mixed it up with other thoughts
And growing up alone doesn't help one sort it out
Even when you're here, you're not no
Never learned to trust another person
Never knew a person who understand my words
No one took the time to understand me
Do I want forgiveness or the thrill of maybe knowing
I could change direction, never caring where I'm going
Sometimes all the time it takes to make your destination
Isn't charted out as clearly as it seems
Now the smell of vaporub comes over me
And all the shame of weakness builds again
Rules and expectations I can't follow any more
I became the person that I am
Wouldn't want to make you think
You haven't found a way to me
It's only that it's not
As simple as it seems to be