If anyone needs advice
On the best way to manage a twenty-four hour drive
You could tell them that I'm your guy
I could explain it in overly pristine detail as they take some notes
For example, we organized your life into the back my van
And left at night
We took a break to buy a mattress
Some new Alan wrenches and a desk
And I, and I dropped you off halfway
I left so early the next day
And with a pocket full of cash
I had to spend it all on gasoline
With forty miles to go
I smelled like stale caffeine and pheromones
You see, I had spaced out ingesting chemicals throughout the day
And I was busy letting the blood rest inside of both of my legs
Shifting through pins and needles
As I switched from manual to cruise control
But this is the last time
So I hope you don't mind
Oh, I hope you don't mind my jealous side
Because you're never coming back to New Jersey
Because you're never coming back to Bucks County
And I'm trying, trying, trying the best that I can
Because I don't want you back in New Jersey
Because I don't want you back in Bucks County
So, I'm trying, trying, trying the best that I can
I'm not gonna stick around and wait in New Jersey
I'm not gonna stick around and drive to Bucks County
I've got a more important plan
With all of my things organized in a van
And a drive that takes about half the time
And a drive that takes about half the time