all of the places have been set
i'm so happy all you honoured guests all came
there's been planning and preparation
to put the normandy invasion to shame
this day is all for you
so now there's nothing left to do but
weep, bride, weep
weep, bride, weep
weep, bride, weep
weep, bride weep
ow your girlhood is over and your womanhood lies stretched out before you
weep, bride, weep
like a dull grey matronly corpse on the coroner's slab
weep, bride, weep
othing but the horrifying agony of childbirth for you to look forward to now
weep, bride, weep
while the melodies of yesterday's parties echo sadly in the past
la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da
weep, bride, weep
weep, bride, weep
ow i'm sorry but it's time for me to talk about the subject of your husband
weep, bride, weep
i guess you think he's pretty 'cute' and pretty smart and maybe even pretty deep
well weep, bride weep
cos he's a closeted marxist who thinks that marriage is state prostitution
weep, bride, weep
so sometimes you'll have to fuck him just to get him to shut up and go to sleep
la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da
weep, bride, weep
la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da
weep, bride, weep
weep, bride, weep
but not too hard, we can't have you collapsing out of sheer desolation
weep, bride weep
because we need you functionally depressive so you'll still get up and drive the kids to class
weep, bride, weep
well at least tonight your father's buying all the liquid consolation
and the musicians will enjoy the bridesmaids in the ass
la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da
weep, bride weep
let's go now!
la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da
weep, bride, weep
la da da da, la da da da, la da da da, la da da, la da da da, la da da da
weep, bride, weep