i'm not a role model, but i'm a grown man
without kids and i can't play a direct hand
in your son or daughter's lives so treat them right - i'm busy
take 'em to the park, toss the frisbee
show them what disney spent a lot of money on
peel them off'a the couch and make 'em run a marathon
if you ever discover marijuana paraphenelia
punch 'em hard enough to paralyze them
and then embarass them,
carry them onto the school's property and bury them
eck deep in concrete and call the cops.
interrogate your kid until they tell you who sold them pot
when they give you a name, you know the game
o matter what you gotta do to lock 'em up, including a frame - do it!
and if the dealer is underage,
plunge a thunderous punch at his lungs
amaze everybody watching with your brute force
you turned a 16 year-old pot dealer into a cold corpse
you did it for justice, you did it for love
ow go and get your kid some respectable drugs
like prozac, adderall, ritalin
and wash it down with some flinstone vitamins