Here's a story about a bloke named Jerry
Got slaughtered then got real lairy
In the club he acted absurd
Then came on to a boxers bird
So he got knocked out
His face swelled up like a rainbow trout
His girl found out the truth
But he couldn't explain "˜cause he lost a tooth
I wanna drink drink drink smoke fuck fight
I wanna shout and scream
I wanna die
I wanna be arrested
I wanna be molested
And I've damaged my brain
Next weekend let's do it again
An anecdote "˜bout a man named Clive
Wasn't one to usually drink drive
But after all he'd been for a snack
His local's a bit far to walk back
A month later and he's sitting in court
For the two lives he cut short
Man slaughter he's convicted
For the pain that he inflicted
Spinning, my head is spinning
Up around around and
Down to the pub
On to the club
My stomach's turning
Oh, my body's burning
Our liquid lives
This is how we all survive
Here's a story about a chap named Garth
Drank 4 pints in hour and a half
Though the night had just begun
'Cause his local pub was open till one
The next morning out in the country
Hung over and on the hunt he
Was still drunk and pissed himself
Fell off his horse and shot himself!
Spinning, my head is spinning
Up around around and
Down to the pub
On to the club
My stomach's turning
Oh, my body's burning
Our liquid lives
This is how we all survive
Come on drink, come on drink, come on drink
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Drink, smoke, fuck, fight
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
This is how we all survive
Here's a story about a girl named Kate
Got wasted then got date raped
When they told the doctors she'd seen
They found no chemicals was in her bloodstream
''Well nothing malicious, but the alcohol levels were suspicious!''
When asked who had hurt her
Poor old Kate couldn't remember.
Spinning, my head is spinning
Up around around and
Down to the pub
On to the club
My stomach's turning
Oh, my body's burning
Our liquid lives
This is how we all survive
Drink, smoke, fuck, fight
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
Our liquid lives
This is how we all survive