Come and listen to a jerk, talk about how hard he works
Come and be a flirt, I'm an expert, you can wipe off this smirk
Do you like rap cause it so happens I'm so ballin
What I mean is between you and me there's a gap don't fall in
What a funny way to approach music, I must be stopped
You cut your eye on the top I drop to the bottom of the pops
Harmony's French, but the melancholy melody's so Slavic
Whether I rap fast or slow the rap flows polysyllabic
From the minute I'm awake its a great day to get this cake
Polishing a mixtape, let me fixate on a flow in 6/8
I'm a lot of things but a left-wing singer-songwriter I'm not
I'm a lot of things but a left-wing singer-songwriter I'm not
Let's smoke all that yeah, we can hang around like a ballsack
Get higher than a top hat on top of a rather tall chap
I'm a cyborg version of George Gershwin I'm a Tin Pan fan
Famous in Paris, I'm embarrassed "˜cause I can't cancan
No way, no how, I could never disappoint a crowd, my God
I just play what they want like a jukebox or an iPod
Write a song here, play a show there, want to tell my dad "so there"
Now that I got what I want I'll be honest I'm so scared
Its all downhill from this spot, unless you never stop, you deserve
Its getting on my nerves, everywhere that I go music nerds
You're out of dumb questions cause the song has "˜em all answered
You're out of dumb questions cause the song has "˜em all answered
So come and listen to a schmuck talk about a bunch of random stuff
And if you've had enough, if you've made it this far, call my bluff
I'm light-years ahead of all you entertainers sittin right here
See I'm not what you think, "˜cause you drink and your breath stinks like beer
Here's a little riddle, in the race to the middle who's mediocre?
I'm cult, if I wanted culture I would eat a yogurt
Let me show you how to beef, you cen even chow down on the whole cow
Got a mouth hole so cold like a south pole on a lowbrow