Waitret, Please, Waitret
(Kinky Friedman, Major Boles, Roscoe West)
Well, I pulled into Dallat on a cold December day
Bought coffee and a doughnut at the Greasy Spoon Caf,
Spied me a pretty young waitret standing by her tray,
But she couldnâ"š¬â"ž¢t believe her sweet young ears when the waitret heard me say:
Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate,
Eatinâ"š¬â"ž¢ ainâ"š¬â"ž¢t cheatinâ"š¬â"ž¢, Lord it ainâ"š¬â"ž¢t no disgrace.
Oh, bring me a Lone Star, make it a case
And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate.
Well, I walked up to the jukebox feeling kind of mean,
The waitret said, â"š¬í…"Hey, stupid, that's a cigarette machine!â"š¬?
â"š¬í…"Well, look-a here, young waitret, would you care to make a bet,
And if that there ainâ"š¬â"ž¢t a jukebox, you can smoke my cigarette!â"š¬?
Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate,
Eatinâ"š¬â"ž¢ ainâ"š¬â"ž¢t cheatinâ"š¬â"ž¢, Lord it ainâ"š¬â"ž¢t no disgrace.
Oh, bring me a Lone Star, make it a case
And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate.
Youâ"š¬â"ž¢re the prettiest thing in Dallat, is Dallat your home ?
No, I come all the way from Houton and I feel so all alone.
I used to live in Autin then I come up to big D
In hopes to get my big break on national TV.
Honey, I think I have what it takes to make you a star â"š¬" but first ...
Oh, waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate,
Eatinâ"š¬â"ž¢ ainâ"š¬â"ž¢t cheatinâ"š¬â"ž¢, Lord it ainâ"š¬â"ž¢t no disgrace.
Oh, bring me a Lone Star, make it a case
And waitret, please, waitret, come sit down on my fate.