The 1960s and the 70s were a honey trap
All the fixes in the studio and on the running track
The lights, the cameras, the action and the theme tune
And all the sordid little parties in the green room
Everybody throw your shoes at the monster
Everybody throw your shoes at the beast
On the TV reading ad-libs off the autocue
Now everybody says of course they always thought they knew
They still rewarded him with Christmas on the kid's ward
And the royal touch upon the shoulders with a big sword
Everybody throw your shoes at the monster
Everybody throw your shoes at the beast
How many nonces are there on the list of New Year's honours
With their hand inside a Nolan sister's Tesco Bombers
How many laptops will be confiscated on the news
Here comes another monster, everybody throw your shoes
Everybody throw your shoes at the monster
Everybody hurl abuse at the freak