She used to do our press
She's got flabby breasts
She's fat and she's ugly
She's a total fucking mess
She's got blonde hair and big jugs
On paper that's OK
But her face looks like an arsehole
So that get's in the way
CHORUS:
Oh, Mel, she's shaped like a barrel
And I know someone who touched her snatch
And it made his finger smell
And they smelt of shit after touching her cunt
Which makes me think
She likes to stroke in each hole
Or wipes it back to front
She's a fucking rotter
With little beady eyes
She's a big fat porker
Who's eaten all the pies
I wouldn't even fuck her
Not even from behind
I couldn't get a hard-on
Over her fatty bacon rind
(By that, I mean her rotten flabby cunt lips)
Mel, flabby cunt lips
Mel, flabby cunt lips
Mel, flabby cunt lips